Funny Whatsapp Status And Messages

Funny Whatsapp Status, Quotes And Messages

Hello readers, Today we are here with some very funny whatsapp status and messages so that you can use them on your whatsapp profile status. We have a wonderful compilation of funny status of whatsapp which you will not find anywhere else because we try to add some very unique and important for you which is not just added for formality.

This is the collection of funny whatsapp status and messages which will become the most funny and fun loving collection of our website in English for you and you can not only add them on your whatsapp status but also you can pick them for sending some fun to your friends and family. You can pick any of them and add them in your whatsapp status. This collection is really very funny as we are updating it regularly so that you can get some very good compilation ever on our website from all over the internet. So you can stay with us for regular update of funny whatsapp status and messages with lots of new funny quotes of whatsapp. And I hope you will surely like all of these status.

We have great compilation ever which you can even share on lots of social media platforms like facebook, twitter, linkedin, google plus, Instagram, whatsapp and many more. In the previous article we have given some best whatsapp status, attitude status for whatsapp including of good morning quotes and good night quotes etc. which you liked most so hope you will like them too. If you are searching some funny whatsapp status in hindi, funny whatsapp status in English, funny status for whatsapp then you are now at the right place. Just check them now.

 

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Funny Whatsapp Status

I wonder what happens when doctor’s wife eats an apple a day.

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Light travels faster than sound…that’s why people appear bright until they spe

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Can’t talk, telepathy only!

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The only time success comes before work is in dictionary.

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The only time success comes before work is in dictionary.

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Funny Status For Whatsapp

One wise guy invented mobile application Whatsapp…..and his wife added last seen feature

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I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.

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If College has taught us anything, it’s texting without looking 🙂

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Eat…sleep….regret……repeat.

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I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle!… He’s dreaming too.

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Mosquitos are like family. Annoying but they carry your blood.

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I will be back before you pronunce afjkhnfkualnfhukcakecnhkj.

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At least mosquito’s are attracted to me. Till my death

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Whatsapp Status Funny

My biggest concern in life is actually how my online friends can be informed of

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Dream as if you’ll live forever..Live as if tomorrow is last one.

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Don’t kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not.

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A book-store is only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking.

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Galileo:Great mind…Einstein:genius mind…Newton:Extraordinary mind….Bill gates:brilliant mind…..ME:Never Mind.

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God is really creative , i mean ..just look at me ?

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Funny Whatsapp Status Message

People that Change Love status after 30 Sec… GF is the Reason…

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One person’s LOL is another’s WTF!

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Everything funnier when your supposed to be quiet..

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I didn’t change, I just grew up. You should try it once.

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My “last seen at” was just to check your “last seen at”.

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I live in a world of fantasy, so keep your reality away from me!

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I love buying new things but I hate spending money.

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My week is basically …Monday–>Monday#2–>Monday#3–>Monday#4–>Friday–>Saturday–>pre-Monday

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You can never buy Love….But still you have to pay for it ..

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Whatsapp Funny Status

I’m not arguing, I’m simply tried to explaining why I’m Right.

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I just saved lot of money by lic life insurance ……..By not having any.

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Life is Short – Chat Fast!

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I’m jealous my parents, I’ll never have a kid as cool as theirs.

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I wish I had google in my mind and antivirus in my heart.

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Totally available!! Please disturb me!!

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I don’t have an attitude problem, I just have a personality that you can’t handle.

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Error: status unavailable

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My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.

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We all are born to die, don’t feel more special than me.

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I don’t care what people think or say about me, I was not born on this earth to please everybody.

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Sometimes all you need is love. Lol, just kidding, you need money. :’).

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Funny Whatsapp Messages

I hate math, but I love counting money.

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Love marriage is like dancing in front of snake and asking him to bite.

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If you can’t convince her then confuse her

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Doing nothing is very hard thing to do…you never know when to finish.

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Always remember you are UNIQUE………… just like everybody else.

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Whenever I think of quit smoking, I need a cigarette.

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Status For Whatsapp Funny

I’m in desperate need of a 6 month vacation… twice a year.

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Waiting for wi-fi network.

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I wish there was a day between Saturday and Sunday.

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I don’t care what people think or say about me, I was not born on this earth to please everybody.

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Should transformers take car insurance or life insurance…..

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I talk to myself often that way I ensure I am talking to better class of people.

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God is really creative, I mean..Just look at me.

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Sleep till you’re hungry….Eat till you’re sleepy.

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Whatsapp Funny Messages

There’s only one problem with your face, I can see it.

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Life is Short – Chat Fast!

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Tip to avoid car insurance……….Join facebook and never leave home.

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Awesome ends with me and ugly starts with u.

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I’ve found the recipe for happiness. Can someone just send me some money so that I can buy the ingredients ?

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Tried to loose weight…….But it keeps finding me.

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Funny Whatsapp

DOESN’T EXPECTING THE UNEXPECTED MAKE THE UNEXPECTED EXPECTED?

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I Wonder What Happens When Doctor’s Wife Eats An Apple A Day…

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Second chances are for losers….either we do it in first place or live it for others.

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WE LIVE IN THE ERA OF SMART PEOPLE AND STUPID PEOPLE.

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I started out with nothing and i still have most of it.

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Sorry vegetarians we can’t pretend

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Funny Whatsapp Quotes

I’M JUST HAVING AN ALLERGIC REACTION TO THE UNIVERSE.

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The Earth without “Art” is just “Eh”.

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They say we learn from our mistakes; so I m making as many as possible!!!Soon I will be a genius :-B

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HEY,YOU ARE READING MY STATUS AGAIN??

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Life is too short. Don’t waste it reading my WhatsApp status….

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Stop checking my status ! Go Get A Life ?

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Funny Status For Whatsapp In English

I STILL MISS MY EX – BUT GUESS WHAT? MY AIM IS GETTING BETTER ????

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I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.

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Your whatsapp status say’s online …..If your online then why aren’t you texting me

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SAVE PAPER, DON’T DO HOME WORK.

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Today morning when I was driving my Ferrari, the alarm woke me up.

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Your eyes water when you yawn because you miss your bed and it makes you sad.

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Funny Short Status For Whatsapp

NEVER GO TO BED MAD. STAY UP AND FIGHT.

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I’m so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes CLOSED

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You can’t put a value on a human life,but my wife’s life insurance company made a pretty fair offer.

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I saw a shampoo with the title: “Rich-looking” So I washed my purse ..

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I talk to myself because I like dealing with a better class of people.

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You are the product of 4 billion years of evolution, now fucking act like it.

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I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.

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Funny Statuses For Whatsapp

I like to hang out with people that make me forget to look at my phone.

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Formula for success…….under promise and over deliver…….

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Behind every great man, there is a surprised woman.

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I need Google in my brain.

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At last got to know how to loose weight in 10 days :Just turn your head right right then left and repeat whenever offered any food ? ?

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Looks like I over-estimated the number of your brain cells.

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I stopped fighting with my inner demons. We are on the same side now.

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Funny Status Whatsapp

I did lots of stupid things on social networking sites but atleast i never commented “Cute pic dear “on girls profile picture

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A man is as young as the woman he feels.

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Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I’m tired of solving them for you.

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A rolling stone gathers no moss… But if I stop the stone then it still takes a long time for the moss to grow.

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If people are talking behind your back, then just fart.

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I don’t need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning

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Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I’m tired of solving them for you.

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I am Cool but Summer Days make me hot..

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Whatsapp Funny

Yesterday I did nothing and today I’m finishing what I did yesterday.

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Coins Always Make Sound But The Currency Notes Are Always Silent! ?that’s why i’m always Calm & Silent

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My style is unique don’t copy it!

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Love is that state of mind when a karan johar film becomes bearable.

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A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..

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I am not failed, Because my success is lost.!

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I’m cool but global warming made me hot

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Comedy Status For Whatsapp

Don’t talk out loud, you lower the IQ of the whole street’

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Love is like fart. If you force it, It’s probably shit.

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100,000 sperms and i was the fastest;)

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Always give your 100 percent ….unless you’r donating blood .

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I’m not sarcastic, I am just intelligent beyond your understanding.

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When i am good i am best , when i am bad i am worst.

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Better the vacuum cleaner the better it sucks!!

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My ex had one very annoying habit – BREATHING

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Sometimes i just wish i’ could fast forward the time to see if in the end it’s all worth it.

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Comedy Whatsapp Status

”Please don’t get confused between my personality & my attitude. My personality is who I am & my attitude depends on who you are!”

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Some people are beautifully wrapped boxes of shit.

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I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.

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Everything that kills me makes me feel alive.

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Whatsapp users never die, they just go offline.

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Whatsapp Funny Msg

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

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fun is like life insurance.The older you get..the more it cost’s.

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I told cashier- I want to open a joint account with anyone who have lots of money.

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It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.

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Happiness is when “Last seen at” changes to “online” and then to “typing..”

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A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

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Funny Quotes For Whatsapp

Just about the time when you think you can make ends meet, somebody moves the ends.

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Give a man fish and you’ll feed him for a day.Teach a man to fish and you can then stick him with a huge amount of fishing School loans.

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I just need a good Wifi and Wife.

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One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

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Whats App Funny Status

Even romeo went from being “in a relationship” to “it’s complicated”.

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Hello madam, do you want Credit Card? Girl: No thanks, I have a Boyfriend.

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Childhood is like being drunk, everyone remembers what you did, except you

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Don’t settle for good.Demand Great.

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Worrying works! 90% of the things I worry about never happen.

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I haven’t slept for 10 days, because that would be too long.

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I’m not lazy, I’m on energy saving mode.

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Just remember…if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.

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I don’t like cocaine, i just like the way it smells;)

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Just wanted to say, you are as useless as “ueue” in a “queue”.

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No, I’m not feeling violent, I’m feeling creative with weapons.

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Status Whatsapp Funny

I like to always carry two sacks around. That way, if someone asks me to lend them a hand, I can say, “Sorry, got these sacks”.

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If you try to pronounce “lmao” you sound like a french cat.

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I may be fat, but you’re ugly – I can lose weight!

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I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by selling my car.

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If procrastination was an Olympic event ,I’d compete in it later.

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Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. So study hard and be evil.

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Life was much easier when Apple and Blackberry were just fruits.

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I’ll try being nicer if you start being smarter.

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Girls are like roads, more the curves, more the dangerous they are.

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I Loved A Girl and She Broke my heart….. Now every piece of my heart love DifferenT Girlz…. People called it flirt Thats Not fair…

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Intelligence is like underwear. It’s important that you have it but there’s no need to show it off.

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Why do women always ask questions that have no right answers?

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We are all part of the ultimate statistic – ten out of ten die.

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I’m listening. It just takes me a minute to process so much stupidity all at once!!

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The winner of the rat race is still a rat.

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My attitude will always be based on how you treat me.

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Xcuse me..I found something under my shoes. .ohh its your Attitude.

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I’m in shape. Round is a shape isn’t it?

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Think about it ..every time we look back at ourselves five years ago we think we were an idiot.

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Funny Quotes For Whatsapp Status

If I had a gun with two bullets and i was with hitler,bin laden and you[insert your ex or your enemy’s name

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Am fantaastic if I drink Fantaa.

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Dear Mario…..I Wasted My Childhood Trying To Save Your Girlfriend.Now, you help me to save mine.

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Wow now I’m a graduate…….Now thermometer is not the only thing that has degrees without brains .

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I am not questioning your honour. I am denying its existence.

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I Am Not Special , I Am Just Limited Edition ?

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I can see you checking my whatsapp status.

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I enjoy when people show Attitude to me because it shows that they need an Attitude to impress me!

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I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.

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I had to take sick day.I’m sick of those peoples.

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I like to take road less travelled…..helps me to avoid traffic.

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I meditate for 20 min every morning …..It helps reduce stress of being 20 min late for everything

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I started out with nothing and i still have most of it:)

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I took IQ test …..results were negative

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I was not busy to be online… I had just gave up on my life when I picked up this girls phone and saw my contact name as “Free Recharge”

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I will marry the girl who look as pretty as in her Aadhaar card (or in matrimonial sites)!!!!

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I wish I could loose weight as easy as I lose my pens,keys,smartphone,my temper and even my mind.

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I wish i could trade my heart for another liver …..so that i can drink more and care less

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Funny Whatsapp Status

I’am looking for a bank loan which can perform two things..give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.

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I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.

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Lazy People Fact. You were too lazy to read that number.

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Life is too short. Don’t waste it reading my watsapp status….

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Life is too short. Dont waste it removing pen drive safely.

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We buy things we don’t need with money we don’t have to impress people we don’t like.

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We live in a society were pizza gets to your house before police.

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When you feel insulted I’m just describing you.

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Why is Monday so far from Friday and Friday so near to monday????

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Every one need some fun in their life and the same we are needed so in our website we are going to give some very awesome funny whatsapp status and messages which you will surely enjoy a lot. You can download them freely without any restriction as you have downloaded whatsapp status and funny chutkule and become more and more funny for doing the task with us.